Muslamic Rapper Sharia 2 Dope Endorses Kamala Harris


25-year old Iranian-American rap megastar Sharia 2 Dope lit up the stage yesterday at a sold out concert in Queefingham, New York.  Known for blockbuster hits like : “Hate Bacon, Ain’t Fakin”, and “Mohammed Is Just Alright With Me”, the icon took a moment out of his performance to wax poetic about Democratic Presidential candidate Kamala Harris.  During a ten minute diatribe he told audience members he was “100 P” behind her run, and referred to her as : “Allah’s messenger in America.”

Andy Dick is currently Thor’s messenger in America. It was probably some kind of drunk decision.

Born in Al Mxyltlpk, Iran, Sharia (Real name Numpsy Shamon), emigrated with his mother in 1999 to Minnesota after hearing the Prince song : “1999” for the first time and believing it to be a message from God.  A straight-A student, young Numpsy became fascinated with rap music and the giants of the genre, including Coolio, Kriss-Kross, Wang Chung, and Queen Laquifa.  Seeing an opportunity to spread a calming influence after 9/11, he took the stage name M.C. Picklebitch, and later changed to Sharia 2 Dope after being threatened with a lawsuit by a different M.C. Picklebitch in New Jersey.

Picklebitch, aka Charles Humpingdale now works educating children about the dangers of venereal disease.

As a performer, 2 Dope admits to espousing his personal politics in his raps.  His 2016 hit “Kick Trump In Da Ballz” for instance, contains a devastating critique of the President, as does his later single : “Racist President Slap My Dick”, which shot up the charts to number three within a week.

It stands to reason that with millions of albums sold and a huge fan base, the artist’s endorsement could go a long way with the Millenial voting crowd.  Will Harris see a “Sharia Bump?”  I got five on it.

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