Trump Offers to Pay For Diamond and Silk’s Funeral After Boating Accident

Our country has suffered a tragic loss, patriots. Diamond and Silk, Trump’s two African American women, were lost in a horrible boating accident. Within hours, Trump contacted their family and offered to pay for all of their funeral expenses.

You can read about their tragic demise here:

Diamond and Silk, 4 Others Lost In Boating Accident

Trump is said to be extremely sad about the incident His spokesman, Joe Barron, gave a short statement at the Palm Beach Country Club, where Trump was golfing this afternoon with a coupon:

“President Trump was almost upset enough to cancel his day, but to play here for half off is a real savings, and he knows Diamond and Silk were probably into couponing before he handed them stardom.

“They will be missed, and their funerals will be paid for.”

The family says Trump prepaid at the strip mall crematorium in West Palm Beach, where Diamond and Silk will get the 2-for-1 special, which guarantees you’ll get at least 35 percent of each person in a single urn. The family will be responsible for transporting the remains, if they’re ever pulled from the lake.

“He also offered us the $695 in cash, if we wanted to use our own funeral home, which is very generous. We’re still waiting on the check. He says it’s in the mail.”

God bless you, Donald Trump, and God bless America.

About Flagg Eagleton-Patriot 139 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.

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