Trump Proposes $50 Fee For Mail-In Voters


Many of the more well-read crowd may remember a collection of tales called : “Aesop’s Fables”, including the story of the Fox and the Grapes.  In summary, a fox spies a bunching of grapes that all the forest creatures have been raving about, but he cannot reach.  Buoyed by these tales, the fox becomes covetous, and goes to great and sometimes painful lengths to attain the fruits.  In the end, when he finally tastes them, he is mocked by the other animals when it’s discovered that the grapes weren’t grapes at all, but a petrified sampling of raccoon droppings.

“HOORAY! Now I’m officially GERMAN!”

The above is an example of a morality play, something that our impeached President Donald Trump knows intimately.  And one moral truism he knows for sure is that sometimes simply charging people needlessly to enrich your own coffers is the noble and righteous thing to do.  And so, he has decided to apply that educational tenet to the 2020 election to ensure that the American people have a secure and forced choice.

Joe Barron of People Who Have Actually Read the Constitution, a far-left fringe organization, disagrees, and says that Trump’s proposal is about as illegal as Brett Kavanaugh’s dick within 500 feet of a sorority house.

“The constitution specifically mentions that there will never be a ‘poll tax’, or any manner of cost in order to vote.  Trump is just really plumbing the depths of desperation now, since he’s going to lose the election and become the historical joke he deserves to be.  There is literally no voter fraud ‘outbreak’ all of a sudden connected to voting by mail.  None.  No matter what his cavalcade of moronic CHUD believes.  It’s a system that has worked just fine for decades.  Maybe if he hadn’t driven citizens inside by botching a deadly pandemic response, he wouldn’t need to cheat and lie to get his grandmas to wheel up to their local high school gym and make pawing his name their last act in life.”

Thank God she managed to get in one last vote before Trump took her social security away.

The proposal will go to Congress this next week, where it will surely be shot down by clearer heads.  But it just goes to show.  Trump is a lot like that proverbial fox.  Happy to have a mouthful of shit.

Be the first to comment