Emotional Rush Limbaugh Announces He Will Donate $10 Million to Trump 2020

Rush Limbaugh is going to die. He knows it. This morning, he recorded an emotional message to be played on the fateful day of his journey to meet Jesus, in which he pledged to give $10 million of his estate to the Trump 2020 campaign.

A spokesman for the Rush Limbaugh show says Rush “was in tears before the recording,” but managed to mostly keep it together to get his message out. “His voice was cracking a bit and you could tell he was emotional, but he’s a trooper.”

According to specialists, Rush has between one week and one year to live, with a realistic estimate of a month being the favorite in Vegas.

The statement was simple and to the point. We’ve obtained a tex copy for those who don’t listen to the radio:

“I’ve come to realize that the fortune I’ve made will need to do some good when I’m gone. I considered donating to the Parkinson’s Foundation to atone for the horrible things I said about Michael J. Fox or to the YWCA to make up for calling a teenage Chelsea Clinton a dog, but it seems that the best use for my funds will be to give it directly to President Trump’s reelection campaign.

I realize that much of what I’ve done over the years will need to be addressed in confession before I go, but I don’t want money to be one of those things. Therefore, giving it to a cause that has the same values I do seems to be the best way to show my dedication.”

Rush says his lawyer will transfer the funds to Trump’s campaign within 72 hours of his death. He’s hopeful that the President can find a good use for it.

God bless you, Rush Limbaugh. May your death come quickly and your journey to the beyond be pleasant.

About Flagg Eagleton 79 Articles
Flagg Eagleton is the son of an American potato farmer and a patriot. After spending 4 years in the Navy and 7 on welfare picking himself up by the bootstraps, Flagg finally got his HVAC certificate and is hard at work keeping the mobile homes of Tallahassee at a comfy 83 degrees.

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