Pelosi : ‘Third Impeachment Still On the Table’


Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi has made it clear that there’s still no love lost between former President Trump and her office. She’s managed to have the bulbous leader impeached not once, but twice, an historic first, and as per a statement made last week at the Joe Barron Center for the Performing Farts in San Francisco, California, it may not be the end.

Speaking of not the end, deceased sulpher-zeppelin Rush Limbaugh is still broadcasting from a fire pit full of barbed wire dildos.

The Speaker’s assistant Speaker, Missy Southard, confirmed that discussions have happened and still are, about a possible third impeachment proceeding to come, this time centered around the disgraced politician’s bungling of the Coronovirus pandemic. Charges for the legal hat-trick would include “Gross negligence towards the health and welfare of the American people”, and “Severe dickheaded incompetence.”

Southard explained that Trump, now a private citizen overseeing a cult of mentally unstable followers, is still able to be held accountable for crimes, in office, or not.

“The Republican defense last time that he’s not President and therefore somehow immune to crimes committed when he was is laughable.  You don’t get a free pass if you shoplift and make it out of the store.  Trump wasn’t held accountable, so we’ll go as many times as we have to to put that corrupt bastard away.  Then we’ll throw him to New York and Georgia.  This guy’s gonna be folding prison jumpsuits in the laundry room for decades.”

Some say that a third impeachment event would only function to take attention away from Democratic President Joe Biden, and provide cover for what Republican window lickers call his “destruction of Americer.”  Indeed, many clothing retailers have already been contracted by Pelosi to begin printing T-shirts.

Yeah, the three percenters are pretty jealous. Theirs are made out of the pubic hair of senior citizens.

The question is : With Trump fading away into obscurity as his former party tries to erase their shame of him, will he finally be convicted?  It’s unclear.  Another question might be : Who will play Wolverine when Marvel finally restarts their X-Men franchise?  I vote for Glen Danzig.

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