Springsteen to Hold Benefit Concert For Impeachment Funding

Apparently, a certain “Boss” hasn’t been told that there’s a bigger Boss.  And that Bigger Boss’s name is Donald J. Trump.

Classic rocker Bruce Springsteen announced yesterday that he would be holding a benefit concert in New York City next month, with all proceeds to be donated to Congress’s fund to impeach the President.  Even with Speaker Nancy Pelosi’s notorious money-wrangling from other sources, funding for the process has still fallen short by several million dollars.  Springsteen told the press assembled at a conference yesterday that he was sure he could fulfill the deficit :

“This is important, alright? Can I get an ‘alright’?  Yeah!  Look, I love this country.  Everyone knows that.  I was…born…in the U.S.A.!  And the biggest threat to it right now is a lying, unrestrained megalomaniac in the White House.  So come along by and help me and help America.  Can I get a ‘lock him up?’  Lock him up!  Lock him up!”

A host of other musicians have signed on to join Springsteen onstage, including Taylor Swift, Geddy Lee, and mutant singing sensation Alison Blaire.  Tickets will be made available in the usual outlets this weekend, so if you’re a fan of The Boss, you’d better hurry before they sell out and you’re left “Dancing in the Dark.”